This one's for all the parents of kindergarteners...
Dear "My Son's Teacher",
When I was pregnant with this beautiful boy, I kept hearing God telling me that he would be sweet natured, loving, and obedient. Yes, those were the words I kept hearing. Those words ran around in my head as my insatiable appetite grew along with my belly. They grew and grew and grew until I thought I might be carrying Godzilla inside!
Then the kicking began. This wasn't the ordinary kicking that babies do. Oh no. This little boy thought he was sitting on little tiny bleachers in there and he took great glee in stomping in a downward motion, as if he was at a basketball game stomping to "We Will Rock You"! Seriously, I did not know that babies could squeeze little chairs in there with them! Those words of obedient and loving kept running around in my head and I really wondered.
After tipping the scales at 200 pounds, I gave birth to the tiny saint only for him to let me know that the same mama's milk that had grown and nurtured two babies prior would not be enough for him. Don't get him wrong …he loved it, but he'd need another 8 ounces of formula as the chaser.
By the time he was two years old he had a new baby sister, and his father and I had lovingly nicknamed him "Blonde Destruction" and "The Flying Dutch Monkey" - as seen here in these photos…
|Thus the "flying" part|
When he began preschool the following year, I kind of quickly kissed him goodbye at the door …and then ran for my life - praying all the way home that I would not get the phone call from the preschool director that Blonde Destruction was sitting next to her in the "uncooperative chair". To my extreme bewilderment, the teacher said he was "sooooooo good" and "soooooo quiet". She said he was the most well-behaved boy in the class! Had I reached an all-time low??? Were the other boys so bad that my Flying Dutch Monkey's behavior paled in comparison? No! Apparently, he (upon setting foot inside the preschool classroom) became my sweet-natured, loving, and obedient saint of a child that God said he was. Wow! Didn't see that one coming!
So, you see, it seems as though Blonde Destruction saves up all that goodness for you teachers. As a matter-of-fact, he informs me that he is "the bestest boy in the whole kindergarten"!
Here are some interesting facts about the Flying Dutch Monkey:
His passions are dinosaurs - the scarier the better - especially when they're terrifying his little sister, drawing and painting, and Godzilla!
He is a "Master Builder" of LEGOS and loooooooved the new LEGO movie. Blonde Destruction loves to keep all LEGOS in tiny pieces all over the floor just so mom can scream in agony as she's walking across the floor - ahem, I mean, so he can really get those creative juices flowing and build spaceships, monsters, and trucks.
He loves putting on costumes and wearing them in new and innovative ways - as displayed here:
|A new version of Spiderman…or a cowboy…or Captain Underpants?|
My Flying Dutch Monkey is a funny, creative, intelligent, energetic, sweet-natured, loving, and obedient boy who thinks outside the box. As his mother, I have learned to be more patient, and my heart has grown immensely from the love this boy gives.
My hopes and dreams for this year? I pray he doesn't help you to learn to be more patient, but I do hope your heart will grow from the love this boy gives.
Bearer of the Flying Dutch Monkey aka Blonde Destruction